I will hope that it is so
The Double SignHard on twenty years have gone by since that night of Leo's vision-most awful years, perhaps, which were ever endured by men-tweyears of search and hardship ending in soul-shaking wonderEnazecntMy death is very near to me, and of this I am glad, for I desue the quest in other realms, as it has been promised to me that Ido I desire to learn the beginning and the end of the spiritual drama ofwhich it has been my strange lot to read some pages upon earthI, Ludwig Horace Holly hate been very ill; they carried me, moredead than alive, down those mountains whose lowest slopes I can seefrom my window, for I write this on the northern frontiers of India.Indeed any other man had long since perished, but Destiny kept mybreath in me, perhaps that a record might remain. I, must bide here amonth or two till I am strong enough to travel homewards, for I have afancy to die in the place where I was bom. So while Ihave strength I willput the story down, or at least those parts of it that are most essential,formuch can, or at any rate must, be omitted.
I shrink from attempting toolong a book, though my notes and memory would furnish me with suffi-cient material for volumewill begin with the vision.After Leo Vincey and I came back from Africa insolitude, which indeed we needed sorely to recover from the fearfulshock we had experienced, and to give us time and opportunity to think,we went to an old house upon the shores of Cumberland that has be-nged to my family for many generations. This house, unless somebodhas taken it believing me to be dead, is still my property and thither Itravel to diThose whose eves read the words I write if any should ever readthem, may ask-What shock?
Well, I am Horace Holly, and my companion, my beloved friendson in the spirit whom I reared from infancy was-nay is-Leo VinceyWe are those men who, following an ancient clue, travelled to theaves of Kor in Central Africa. and there discovered her whomught, the immortal She-wohg-mmusi-be-obeyed In Leo she foumd her lovethat re-born Kallikrates, the Grecian priest of Isis whom ssand years before she had slain in her jealous rage, thus executing onhim the judgf thegoddess. In her also I found the divinihom I was doomed to worship from afar, not with the flesh, for that islost and gone from me, but, what is sorer still, because its burden ising with the will and soul which animatthroughout thecountless eons of his being. The flesh dies, or at least it changes, and itspassions pass, but that other passion of the spirit-that longing foris undying as itself.What crime have I committed that this sore punishment should be laidme? Yet. in truth. is itat black and terrible Gate which leads to the joyous palace of Rewards?her friend and his and dwell with themeternally, and I believe herFor how many winters did we wander among the icy hills and desertsStill, at length, the Messenger came and led us to the Mountain, andthe Mountain we found the Shrine, and in the Shrine the Spirit May notthese things be an allegory prepared for our instruction? I will take comfort. I will hope that it is so. Nay I am sure that it is so.It will be remembered that in Kor we found the immortalThere before the flashing rays and vapours of the Pillar of Life she de-Lared her mystic love, and then in our very sighso horrible that even now after all which has been and gone, I shiver atits recollection. Yet what were Ayesha s last words? Forget me not.aDety on y shame. I die not. I shagain and shallIsweay teit is trueWell, I carnot set out that history afresh. Moreover it is written; thenan whom i trusted in the matter did not fail me. and the book he madf it seems to be known throughout the world. for I have found it here inEnglish, yes, and read it first translated into Hindostani. To it then Ireferthe curiousIn that house upon the desolate sea-shore of Cumberland. we dwelt ayear, mourning the lost, seeking an aby which it might be foundagain and discoveringHere our strength came back to us, andLeo s hair that had been whitened in the horror of the Caves, grew againfrom grey to golden. His beauty returned to him also, so that his facewas as it had been, only purified and saddened
Well I remember that night-and the hour of illumination. We vheart-broken, we were in despair. We sought signs and could findThe dead remained dead to us and no answer came to all our crying.It was a sullen August evering, and after we had dined we walkedupon the shore, listening to the slow surge of the waves and watchingthe lightning flicker from the bosom of a distant cloud. In silence wwalked, till at last Leo groaned-it was more of a sob than a groasped myI can bear it no longer. Horace. he said-for so he calledam in torment. The desire to see Ayesha once more sapWithout hope I shall go quite mad. And I am strong, I mayWhat then can you do?I asked.I can take a short road to knowledge-or to peace, he answered sol-enly,"I can die, and die I will-yes, tonight.I turned upon him angrily, for his words filled me with feaLeo, you are a coward. I said. " Cannot you bear your part of painthers do?am, ando o s as you do, Horace, "he answered with a dreary laugh, forYYoune curse lies-with less cause. Well, you are stronger than Imore tough; perhaps because you have lived longer. No, I canIt is a crime, "I said, ' the greatest insult you can offer to the Powerthat made you, to cast back its gift of life as a thing outworn, contempible and despised. A crime, I say, which will bring with it worse punish-ment than any you can dream; perhaps even. the punishment of everlast-ing separation.Doesstretched in some torture-den commit a crime if hnatches a knife and kills himself, Horace? Perhaps; but surely that sinshould find forgiveness-if tom flesh and quivering nerfor mercy. I am such a man. and i will use that knife and take my chance.She is dead. and in death at least I shall be nearer her.Why so, Leo? For aught you know Ayesha may be living
Write a Comment